By Caeriel Crestin - For Weekender

Sign language: What do the stars have in line for you this week?

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Scorpio (Oct. 23-Nov. 21)

My favorite lovers have been wild guys in and out of bed, but I’ve also had loads of fun with men who were outwardly prudish but insanely passionate behind closed doors. That sharp contrast felt like a dirty secret I was excited to be in on. Is the person you’re currently interested in all they seem? Not really. I think you’ll be pleasantly surprised to learn that they’ve got layers and layers — each one more interesting than the last. So what are you waiting for? It’s going to take time to get to that juicy, fascinating center. Start peeling!

Sagittarius (Nov. 22-Dec. 21)

In the past, when choosing between safety and adventure, you’ve nearly always selected the riskier option. Why bask in the familiar when you can venture into the unknown? Now, though, something in you is urging you towards the safer, more comfortable option. I’m surprised you’re resisting it so much. What’s that about? Adventure out of habit? You’ve done the venturing-boldly-into-the-unknown-thing, many times. Weirdly, that’s the familiar choice. This would actually be venturing into the unknown: being safe, secure, and responsible. If you have an impulse in that direction, why don’t you give that a try this time?

Capricorn (Dec. 22-Jan. 19)

Tiny details can hugely affect your day-to-day happiness and well-being. For me, sunlight, warmth, and a few sensual pleasures can make me start my day happily (I’ve grown fond of hot bubble baths and creamy coffee drinks, for example). Sure, it’s possible for me to be happy without these things, but I’ve got to work harder at it. Why bother? It’s easy enough to set myself up with a few things that’ll automatically make my life much more pleasurable. This week, improve your baseline of happiness. Make it so you don’t have to work so hard to be euphorically happy — simply because it’s not so far from where you start each day.

Aquarius (Jan. 20-Feb. 18)

You’re neither imbecile nor enlightened monk. You’d have to be one of those to enter new situations with a truly blank mind, free of all expectations. Don’t delude yourself into thinking you’ve managed to rid yourself of all preconceived notions about something. You may have succeeded at burying them out of sight, so you’re not even aware of how they’re skewing your perception, but they’re still there. Acknowledge that, and you’ll at least be able to account for them, and adjust accordingly. This week dig them up and put them on the table. You want to see things clearly, at least, don’t you? That’s the only way.

Pisces (Feb. 19-March 20)

Admit it, you’re in love with the tension between what you have and what you wish you could have — perhaps more in love with that delicious limbo than with the dream that’s generating it. In other words, you’d rather stay here, between reality and fantasy, instead of proceeding onward to actual fulfillment of that fantasy. Deep down you know that getting what you want would mean sullying it by bringing it down into the gritty real world, rife with compromises. Accept it. This is actually where you want to be. Relax. Take pleasure in where you are, instead of pretending you’d really rather be someplace else.

Aries (March 21-April 19)

Get over it. Yes, your feelings are hurt, and with good reason. But in the grand scheme of things this is no big deal. It might be hard to let go of, because this time you’re 100% in the right (and how often does that happen?). But you should let go of it, anyway. The person who did you wrong has done you right many, many times, so letting them off the hook for this one (admittedly grievous) mistake is the least you can do. There’s no need for emotionally grueling discussions, begging for forgiveness, or any of that. Just move on, without drama. Once you do (and once the indignation passes) you’ll realize it was exactly the right thing to do.

Taurus (April 20-May 20)

As I age, I reflect on people who influenced me growing up. I’m fascinated by how my perception of them changes as I approach and pass the ages they were when I knew them; my respect for them grows or diminishes accordingly. You know how difficult it is to understand someone who’s coming from an incredibly different place in their life, especially if it’s somewhere you’ve never been. Give them the benefit of the doubt this week, and don’t judge them too harshly, even if you currently disagree. Watch what you say. You may have to eat your words in a couple decades. Not only will they not taste good — it might then be too late to take them back in any case.

Gemini (May 21-June 20)

Miscalculations are the name of the game this week. If you plan a party, you’ll either be swimming in food and booze for your paltry handful of guests, or you’ll be drowning in partygoers complaining there’s not enough food or booze. Goldilocks is on holiday and “just right” is a phrase that will not apply to anything you do this week. I know I’m always encouraging people to trust their instincts, but this week your normally astute intuition is way off. Don’t try to get anything spot on. Err on the side of caution, and choose the options that accommodate the widest range of possibilities. It might cost more money, but it’ll save your nerves.

Cancer (June 21-July 22)

Prepare to square off with your significant other (or the closest thing you have to one). This is a tough situation. The problem is, they’re being unrealistically optimistic and idealistic about a certain aspect of your future, and you’re trying your best to see and deal with things as they are. Recognize that it’s painful for some people to wake up to reality, and it sucks for you to have to play the role of alarm clock. However, resist the temptation to let them sleep in. Even if that feels like the kind thing to do, it’s actually patronizing and cruel. It’s time, my dear. Ring your bell and wake them up.

Leo (July 23-Aug. 22)

Your two astrological commandments this week are: Be more responsible, and play more. At first blush, these two things may seem to be at opposite poles, but they’re actually quite symbiotic. The fewer loose ends you’ve got lying around or weighing on your mind, the more free you’ll feel to cut loose, without the guilt or anxiety that otherwise might weigh heavy on your mind. It’s actually quite simple, and immediately viable — you’ll get instant, very gratifying results. Now go get shit done, Leo, so you can do nothing. Pay your bills so you can play!

Virgo (Aug. 23-Sept. 22)

Let there be delighted confusion! My wish is for you to experience bewildered joy. It’s not often you let yourself get swept off your feet by a person or experience. It’s not exactly in your control freak nature (I say that in the most affectionate way). But I hope by now you’ve gotten at least a chance or two to experience the exhilarating thrill of truly letting go and letting the wind take you wherever it wants, and not knowing exactly what will happen, or when, how, or why. This week, give that another go. The astrological currents are flowing strongly in very delicious directions; the worst thing you could do is try to swim against them.

Libra (Sept. 23-Oct. 22)

These aren’t irreconcilable differences, though they may feel that way. You and your buddy, though you usually see eye-to-eye on most things, are viewing this particular scenario from such different angles you can’t even be sure you’re looking at the same thing. Each of you finds the other’s perspective virtually inconceivable. But let’s keep molehills from becoming mountains. Your buddy isn’t arguing that killing people is alright, or that his heroin addiction is healthy. The topics under debate are abstract philosophical ideas. You don’t have to agree with his views on reincarnation, or Machiavellian ethics. If he can accept that your principles are different than his, you should be able to do the same. Once you get that out of the way, you’ll find you can probably go back to getting along famously.

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By Caeriel Crestin

For Weekender

To contact Caeriel, send mail to [email protected]

To contact Caeriel, send mail to [email protected]