By Caeriel Crestin - For Weekender

Sign language: What do the stars have in line for you this week?

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Scorpio (Oct. 23-Nov. 21)

When your usual sources of support and co-conspiracy aren’t available, it’s time to search further afield. Luckily, there’s someone with whom you have regular contact that you’ve never yet teamed up with. You’ll probably be surprised by who I mean, because you’d never guess that this particular person could potentially be your perfect collaborator. Drop a few hints, watch for signs that an alliance is possible, then go for it. What do you have to lose, after all? Your other choices are nonexistent or unequivocally inappropriate. Chances are, things will work out even better than you had reason to expect.

Sagittarius (Nov. 22-Dec. 21)

Obviously, our planet is in trouble. Pretty much anyone who actually knows about this shit says that if we continue as we have our certain doom is a done deal — almost certainly in our lifetimes. Our greenest efforts (resisted as they are by our greedy, shortsighted politicians) are still not nearly enough. Waiting for people to invent better technologies and tap into other sources of energy isn’t such a hot idea, either. We all have to make sacrifices; the problem is many of us are too lazy and/or selfish to do it. Are you really okay with having an overall negative impact on the planet? I think we’d all like to leave things better than how we found them. This week’s a good one to work towards that goal.

Capricorn (Dec. 22-Jan. 19)

Since the millennium, our world has started to look more and more like the sci-fi future imagined in my youth; things we now regard as commonplace would have been regarded as fantastical just a few decades ago — though everyone already expected them anyway. What’s that? You still haven’t gotten your jetpack or moon base vacation? Well, get on that! Your childhood conceptions of adulthood’s possibilities are closer than you think. I don’t care whether we’re talking about a hover car, or a kind of relationship, or some form of spiritual enlightenment. It’s not entirely out of your grasp. This week, actively reach for it — even if it means you have to practically invent it from scratch.

Aquarius (Jan. 20-Feb. 18)

Halloween is a time for people to don disguises, right? Not necessarily. It can also be a chance for some of us to reveal hidden truths. In a way, we’re all witches in hiding who can only safely emerge once a year. Halloween is the perfect chance — if you’ve got the guts — to show off your secrets instead of concealing them. Consider it a test drive. You can laugh off anyone’s negative response — it was just a costume, right? That’ll give you a chance to retreat and rethink. However, I’m guessing that you’ll mostly get positive reactions. Wouldn’t it be great (metaphorically speaking, at least) if you never had to take this “costume” off again?

Pisces (Feb. 19-March 20)

Sometimes conflicts are unavoidable, no matter how hard you try. This week mismatched expectations could start fires. One of you isn’t aiming high enough, and settling for something adequate that could be much, much better. Are you the one who’s happy with mediocrity (perhaps without knowing it)? If someone’s pushing you to put in that extra effort, they probably have a reason. Humor them, even if you don’t see the point. And if it’s someone else who’s under-achieving, here’s your chance to relish a role you rarely get to play: inspired ass-kicker and whip-cracker.

Aries (March 21-April 19)

You’re just one person, but people can get wildly different impressions of you depending on how they get to know you. If someone’s only experienced you by viewing your social media, or picking through your garbage, or meeting you at work, they’re only getting a narrow, edited version of the real you. It’s virtually impossible for anyone to ever get to know the complete, real you, but it’s certainly possible for everyone to get to taste a few more slices of the whole pie. Since it’s a tasty dish everyone should get to try, won’t you make a few more servings available this week?

Taurus (April 20-May 20)

When was the last time you were truly thrilled about something? I know you Bulls have a reputation to maintain—something about being “down to earth,” or perhaps a bit cynical. However, I’d hate to think you might have given up altogether on being excited (or showing it). There’s got to be something that would truly electrify you (besides a fork in a power outlet). We all want to see you squeal and jump up and down like an excited kid, and not just for the laugh factor. What would do that to you? Come on, give us a hint. We just might pick it up and run with it.

Gemini (May 21-June 20)

How many examples of people following their dreams do you need to see, before you’ll give it a try, too? All the people I know (or know of) who are doing something cool are simply people who decided to take a leap of faith and try doing something new, without any real assurance that it’d succeed. It’s not easy, but it is easier than you think to make your labor of love replace your day job. The Internet is an amazing place to find like-minded people who’d help make it all happen. You might fall flat on your face, but unless you put yourself in a position to do exactly that, you’ll also never soar.

Cancer (June 21-July 22)

You’re such a creature of habit that breaking that habit — even if it’s something you really want to do, which is good for you — can make you irritable and out of sorts. Don’t mistake the transition period for the new chapter, though. It will take you a while to settle into and enjoy your altered routines. In the meantime, you might feel a bit cranky. So what? Let yourself be cranky. Have faith in your original concept—what you’re doing is a good idea, even though that seemed a lot more certain before you actually gave it a try. Persist. You made the right decision. Once you see it through to its conclusion, that’ll be so obvious, you’ll wonder how you ever doubted it.

Leo (July 23-Aug. 22)

Last night I dreamt about a pair of redheads who were both competing for the same political office. I commented: “Why do all redheads end up in politics or showbiz?” I should have asked that about Leos, though. Even if you’re not onscreen or currying votes, most Leos semi-regularly find a way to bask in the spotlight of people’s attention. It could be at work or socially, but Lions usually feel relatively unfulfilled unless they get to shine in a crowd, organizing or entertaining people. Where does this integrally Leonine trait get expression in your life? This week, work on finding at least one more place for it. Once you do, you’ll be so glad you did.

Virgo (Aug. 23-Sept. 22)

Buy a comfy couch. It’s not for you; we both know you’ll rarely actually sit on it long enough to notice. It’s for all the people who might visit you; they need to be cozy, since you won’t let them do anything while you bustle about preparing snacks and entertainment for your guests. You’ve been looking for ways to make your general selflessness less strenuous and simultaneously more effective. There’s one. You’ll discover more, if you try. All you need to do is really put yourself in other people’s shoes (or, in this case, butts).

Libra (Sept. 23-Oct. 22)

It’s not that you don’t have opinions. It’s that you don’t feel the pressure to always loudly express them (like those boisterous Leos you know), and that you’re open-minded enough to consider changing them when presented with compelling information. However, there are a few times when this approach is actually counterproductive. This week, you may be presented with a leadership void, when a group of people flounder because no one will step up and say what they think and guide them in any one direction. (Where are those bossy Leos when you need them, right?) Even if it’s all the same to you, the universe has dumped this one on your shoulders. It’s time to pick a side, and take everyone else there, too.

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By Caeriel Crestin

For Weekender

To contact Caeriel, send mail to [email protected]

To contact Caeriel, send mail to [email protected]