The Prenuptial Project: Life stops for no one, including this bride-to-be
This past weekend, Mikey and I spent time with our families at a winery, enjoying the changing colors of the leaves and some 80 degree weather.
It was a nice, relaxing weekend, filled with family, friends and some good music (and great wine).
While we were there, some friends of my sister were asking about wedding plans and how everything was coming along, and one of them recently got married.
“If I could do it all over again, I’d elope,” she joked.
And that spoke to me.
There is no denying that planning a wedding is stressful. Planning anything is stressful. It’s the most expensive day of my life, and next to graduating from college, the most important. In trying to make sure Mikey and I are happy, I need to also make sure I throw a party that people enjoy.
I’ve tried to keep my stress bottled away, and that’s easier said than done.
Right now, everything seems calm. We have all of the big decisions taken care of, and a lot of smaller decisions too. We have favors picked out, decoration ideas saved and even bridesmaids dresses chosen. It’s like I’m light years ahead of the game. At least, that’s how I feel anyway.
But I know this feeling won’t last.
Based on how fast time is flying, I know this calm feeling is also fleeting. Once we get into the new year, I know every free moment I have will be spent crafting, doing seating charts, writing a ceremony and making sure Mikey and the groomsmen order suits, in addition to what seems like a million other tasks.
I’ve created about five new Pinterest boards just for bridal shower and decoration ideas, so I can kid myself into thinking my chaos is organized.
The reality is also starting to hit me that my life does not stop to accommodate my wedding planning, no matter how much I would like to hit the pause button.
To add another layer of chaos into this fall/winter, Mikey and I are moving into a new apartment in December.
To add another layer, we have some renovations to help out with too.
What does this have to do with planning my wedding? Not a whole lot, but, it illustrates my point that life stops for no one, including this bride.
And this is a concept that I struggle with. I know things are out my control, like time and whether or not someone is going to like the food at my wedding. My problem is that I refuse to let go of the anxieties over those issues, and instead turn all these little molehills into giant mountains. I’m spending every waking moment trying to figure out how to scale these peaks, not realizing that there’s a road through the mess.
I don’t want to make it seem like I’m going through this maze alone either. I make sure to mention how amazing Mikey has been through all of this every chance I get, and I mean that. Unfortunately, I’m the only one living in my mind, so while he helps bring me back down when we’re together, I still have a lot of time to myself to worry.
My support system goes beyond that too. Between my family and Mikey’s family, my sister, my amazing bridesmaids and even the groomsmen, Mikey and I have an army of people helping us out every step of the way.
So yeah, maybe it would be easier to elope. But I don’t think it’d be nearly as wonderful.
Reach Brigid Edmunds at 570-991-6113 or on Twitter @brigidedmunds
Editor’s note: Brigid Edmunds is a reporter and paginator for the Times Leader and Weekender. When she’s not working, she’s busy planning her upcoming nuptials to fiance Mikey Lawrence.
If you’re a bride-to-be, recently got married or a vendor and would like to offer advice for brides, email her at [email protected]
Her column, The Prenuptial Project, will run twice a month in Weekender.