The music wasn’t picked out; the ceremony wasn’t written; and the hall wasn’t decorated.
All of these details were in my latest wedding-themed nightmare. If I’m being honest, it has been a while since I’ve had one of these dreams, and in the past few months, we have accomplished a great deal.
I think the fact that we have to write our own ceremony and have more freedom with music scares me a little bit, and the dream served as a way to remind me that I need to kick it into gear with those decisions.
This past week, I took care of one of those issues: the music. Coming from a musical family gives me built-in options for singers, and my brother has so graciously taken that task on. I am also extremely lucky because I happen to know some seriously talented musicians, and I have a friend across the country willing to play guitar and travel in early for practices.
So, with our musicians already on board, the only other choice to make is the actual music.
In theory, being able to pick whatever songs (that aren’t church songs) you want to represent your marriage is a dream come true. However, being in a couple with very different tastes is music is also a challenge. Mikey has been super supportive of every decision I’ve made so far, but I wanted to make sure he was equally comfortable with the music decision. I also don’t want it to seem like this was some grand fight or one person got their way while the other one didn’t; what I thought would be a tougher challenge actually came easily for us.
What did happen is I made sure to play every song I wanted included in the ceremony and say “Isn’t this such a pretty song? I think it would be perfect for the ceremony.”
This worked almost all of the time.
There were some songs he wasn’t a fan of, particularly regarding the first dance and what he felt comfortable dancing to, but I think altogether our list is a nice balance of newer and older music (I was able to sneak in two Beatles songs, but one is a cover so it only half counts.)
I asked Mikey about what he thought of our music choices and the process to get there. He said, and I have to agree, that our music choices fit our personalities. While obviously there is a serious tone to the whole list, we were able to have some fun and showcase the lighthearted side of our relationship, which I think is equally important.
Before Mikey and I even thought about getting engaged, I already knew what song I wanted to walk down the aisle to. This might seem weird, but while other girls dreamt about their perfect dress, I was thinking about the perfect song.
My song is “Dearest” by Buddy Holly, which is one of my favorite songs of all time, and I’ve played it for Mikey countless times, so he became a fan as well.
And the song choice was important to me. As the daughter of a single mother, I knew that I would be walking down the aisle alone, something that no matter how much you come to terms with, is a little uneasy. But a lot of this wedding is non-traditional, so no matter how I get down the aisle, I wanted to make sure that the music was perfect, because once I get down that aisle, I’ll be side-by-side with my best friend.
Reach Brigid Edmunds at 570-991-6113 or on Twitter @brigidedmunds.
Editor’s note: Brigid Edmunds is a reporter and paginator for the Times Leader and Weekender. When she’s not working, she’s busy planning her upcoming nuptials to fiance Mikey Lawrence.
If you’re a bride-to-be, recently got married or a vendor and would like to offer advice for brides, email her at [email protected]
Her column, The Prenuptial Project, will run twice a month in Weekender.