Dear Melissa,
I recently broke up with my longterm boyfriend. We had been together for nearly a decade, and, in that time, had lived together and adopted a dog who is the light of both of our lives. Now that we are apart with no chance of reconciliation, he wants to share joint custody of our dog. I am not too keen on the idea and feel like he’s just trying to stay in my life. What do I do?
Dog mom
Dear Dog mom,
If the dog was the light of both of your lives, this might actually not be about you. If he really loved this dog, it sounds like its not an attempt to stay in your life, just an effort to keep in touch with his baby — the dog, not you. People in relationships that don’t work out share custody all of the time. If the break-up was messy or you are that concerned with him still trying to peer into your private life, perhaps you can recruit a third party, like a mutual friend or a family member who is comfortable with both of you to help transfer custody between the two of you, and you can work out a custody schedule. The dog loves both of you as well and is caught in the middle. Try doing what is best for Fido, and if you can meet for custody drop-offs at a specific location, your ex will have no involvement in your current life outside of the drop-offs and pick-ups. It sounds to me, though, he just wants to see his dog. Good luck!
Melissa
