Advice from Melissa: My ex is dragging my name through the mud
I started dating a guy who travels a lot for work and is often on the road. We were only dating a few months when I met someone local and we started talking. I had been very lonely, and this guy gave me a lot of attention so I emailed my guy and let him know it was over and then started officially dating the new guy.
My ex came home and said he never received my email and was still under the impression we were together. He is now telling everyone we know that I am a cheater and its really getting to me because I didn’t cheat! What do I do?
Painted as a monster
First thing’s first. Perhaps an email wasn’t the most dignified way to end this relationship, especially without a read receipt. We are adults with cell phones. A Dear John email was a way to end things without confrontation that probably wasn’t the best route to take because it wasn’t fair to the guy. Granted you were only dating a few months, but still, a phone call would be better in the future.
Secondly, you are not a cheater. This guy is hurt and using his words as weapons which definitely isn’t OK. With any hope he will calm soon and the talking will stop, but you can try talking to him, or if the situation is too messy, ask a mutual friend to talk to him.
In the future, when ending a relationship, it should be a conversation. That way it is abundantly known what your decision is, and the message is going to be received loud and clear!
Girl Talk began in 2012 as a telltale horror story of the city’s most epic dating disasters and has evolved into a column about love, life experiences and growing up. Melissa also has a weekly Girl Talk TV segment on PA Live, WBRE, and a radio segment every Wednesday on 98.5 KRZ.