As the years go on, our personal definition of love changes. We are more in tune with our personal preferences, likes, dislikes, types of features we are looking for in a mate, but ultimately, we still strive for the feeling that love gives. We become so obsessed with finding the perfect mate, that we can lose sight of our initial understanding of what love is. Sometimes we settle, sometimes we set impossible standards, but sometimes, we just have to let ourselves get back to the basics.
I was having a heart-to-heart with my daughter one sunny Wednesday afternoon, and she was telling me about the boy she has a crush on at school. After seeing me go through the emotional wringer in a few of my recent relationships, she said she wouldn’t have a crush unless that person fully deserved it. She may be wise beyond her 7 years.
Since her standards were so high, I was curious what deemed this boy worthy of my daughter’s affections. She told me that she fell on the playground and hurt her ankle. All the other kids ran to play, but he stopped to help her and made sure she was OK. Then he flagged down a teacher and walked her to the nurse’s office.
I guess chivalry isn’t dead after all. It is alive and well and lurking on the second-grade playground. Maybe kids have it right – they appreciate the simple things. It doesn’t matter what he does for a job or how he looks – what matters is how he made her feel — special.
So my friends asked their kids what they thought love was. As predicted, Bill Cosby had it right with “Kids Say the Darndest Things.”
Lucas: “It’s a heart, you know, you just like someone.”
Brady: “That you like someone a really, really, really, really real lot.”
Johanna: “Caring for someone so much that you get this feeling inside.”
Rorey: “Love is baseball.” (I agree buddy. Go Red Sox!)
Dominik: “Something you really, really like – like Minecraft and hockey.”
Bella: “Something that is really special to you like cheer, my friends and my stuffed animals.”
Alex: “Hearts mean love.”
Camryn: “I love a boy when we can laugh together.”
Isaiah: “Love means that you love someone that you live with…I don’t know?”
Jonathan: “Well, love isn’t a thing, it’s a feeling that you like someone a lot.”
So maybe they kids have had it right all along. You should love someone who makes you laugh and feel special, someone who takes care of you and gives you that feeling inside. From age 4 to 400, it is the most magical feeling in the world.