Full name: Barbie Esther Kzrewzinski

Hometown: Nanticoke, PA

Favorite Weekender feature: Slow Chord

Favorite bar/restaurant: Tink’s!

What are you passionate about? Hair krimping and my Bedazzler. OH, OH! Temporary tattoos are totes major, too! #squeal

Who do you admire? Sophia Vergara. She carries the same boob-to-arm ratio I do. And boy does she carry it!

What’s something most people don’t know about you? I have a master’s in French Philology and Francophone Studies from Brandeis. My thesis expounded on the inextricable link between the works of Alexandre Dumas, René Descarte and François Truffaut and the modern middle class population in France.

Are you a dog person or a cat person? OMG Puppiessss!

If you had to pick, would you want someone with beauty or brains? Um, beauty. I don’t care if that’s really shallow. I don’t feel the need to say ‘brains’ just so no one will think I mean what I don’t really mean it. Sorry not sorry.

My last meal would be … Pierogies, my dude! Extra butter and onions.

My theme song would be … That “Perfect Day” song from Legally Blonde is so me.

My best concert was … Losing Caufield and Livingston at the Staircase!

For a good time I … Drive with the top down through the streets of Malibu blasting Beyoncé with my most unproblematic faves. She’s totes my idol. Queeeeeen! #beyhive