I was at Party on the Square last week to promote Weekender with my colleagues. Every time I’m surrounded by college students, I have some sort of flashback to my college days. Since most of the students at the event seemed to be sober, I had flashbacks of my sober moments in college. One of my most productive sober accomplishments in college was being picked out of thousands of applicants to intern for the E! network, the world’s largest entertainment news provider.
My internship at E! was one of the best experiences of my life. I got to meet Ryan Seacrest and walk the red carpet at the Oscars. It was hours before the show even started, but still sick. There was one part of the internship that sucked: The time I got a new intern supervisor. She was a bitch.
It was two months into my internship, and my supervisor was leaving because she got a job as an assistant to Tina Fey’s talent manager. All of the interns at “True Hollywood Story” were upset she was about to leave and were not looking forward to having a new boss.
I remember walking in to work one morning alongside my friend Chelsey, who interned at another department. We became fast friends when I learned she went to Wilkes University.
“OMG!” Chelsey shouted as we were crossing the street. “Look at Kristen! She’s holding a briefcase.”
Kristen was a girl that interned with me, and was the most stuck-up person you could ever come across. Not only did she walk around like her poop smelled of ice cream, she also talked as if she were delivering the 5 o’clock news — all the time!
“Why would she need a briefcase?” Chelsey asked.
“She needs something to carry that stick she always has up her ass,” I said.
The fact of the matter was that it was very odd for her to be carrying a briefcase as an intern. The executive producer for the show we interned didn’t even carry a briefcase!
That day we were supposed to bring in our resumes for our supervisor to help us tweak. As all of the interns carried our resumes in our backpacks, Kristen felt it necessary to buy a new briefcase for the document. Later that day, while all of us were sharing our resumes with each other, I decided to be nice and ask to see her resume, even though I didn’t give a rat’s ass what was on it.
“Umm, I wouldn’t really feel comfortable with you looking at my resume,” she barked in the same tone as if she were reporting a tragic car accident.
“You’re from Minnesota,” I told her. “What do you have to be so stuck up about?”
She wouldn’t look at me for the rest of the day, which was no punishment in my eyes.
The next day our supervisor gathered all of the interns together.
“As you know I’m leaving next week,” our supervisor explained. “I just wanted to tell everyone that your new supervisor, the person taking my place, is Kristen.”
Reach Justin Adam Brown at 570-991-6652 and follow him on Instagram @justinadambrown