WORDS: My two cents

by Rachel Pugh
Weekender General Manager
Times Leader Director of Community Relations

I believe part of my core involves this intense desire to improve upon that which is not perfect in my life.

And after a lifetime of attempting to somehow improve what I have felt is broken, I began to learn that often, I am trying to fix things that may not be the best for me in the end anyway. It took about 32 years, but after a very wise woman told me, “Rachel, just always try to keep your side of the sidewalk clean,” I decided I should change. Although cliche, I learned things really do happen for a reason.

• Love life

In 2010, when a three-year relationship needed to end, I fought for it, most likely longer than I should have. Looking back, I’m not convinced I was that upset about the relationship ending, but rather that I couldn’t fix it. Finally, when I took off the tool belt and simply let it end without any animosity, I allowed the change to occur. And it did. Six months later, I met someone I love. Eleven months later he proposed. Things happen for a reason.

• Friendship

I’ve had a lot of friends at different stages in my life. Personalities evolve. I believe it is not until our more mature adulthood that we often gain the best friends we will have for life. I had some friends for more than a decade, but this year began to discover our interests were going in different directions. Things just didn’t seem the same among us — because they weren’t. I was now 33 and not the crazy party girl I was in my twenties. I was a little sad about the realization, but I also didn’t want to feel as though I was trying to change anyone or force anyone into my evolved interests. No hard feelings or anger on my behalf, but rather a mere shift in direction and, overall, in life. I wish I could say I received the same respect in return. Regardless, I kept the tool belt off, thought only positive thoughts and focused on some of my other friendships. I’ve enjoyed more lunches with Ed. I’ve shared tears and dinner and wine with Lynn. I’ve watched Iliana’s little boy, John, grow and walk and dance. Things happen for a reason.

• Career

I have been at the Weekender for nearly 11 years and have spent some of those years with dual duties at The Times Leader. My titles have changed. I’ve taken on different responsibilities. And in 2011, I witnessed a good portion of the Weekender staff coming and going. We have a new editor, Nikki M. Mascali, two new sales reps, Alyssa Baldacci and Shelby Kremski, and a new staff writer, Stephanie DeBalko. In a tough economic climate and in an industry that is constantly changing, turnover is never thought about favorably. This would mean that we would have to work harder and even more closely together. This also meant that we would have more office arguments, but even more office laughter.

We witnessed “firsts:” Seeing Nikki find a new love for children, which we discovered when she pulled into Grotto Pizza for a promotion with her boyfriend and his two children in a top-down convertible. Senior sales rep John Popko and I stood in shock, saying, “We never thought we’d see the day.” Creative director Steve Husted getting threatened by fans that his tires would get slashed when he didn’t choose their band as the winner for a contest. Or John getting glasses and accepting the whole “aging” process. Or quiet Stephanie having to read racy romance novels and quote them in a cover story. Or Alyssa bringing her dog, Sarge, to the office when I thought consultants were visiting the building. Or Shelby running a provocative staff photo despite our warnings she would get interesting phone calls the next day (she did). It’s been a year of good old-fashioned belly laughs with people I genuinely respect and have worked closer with than ever before because the Weekender changed. Things happen for a reason.

I believe all the developments in my personal and professional life have taught me something. Things happened without me panicking and trying to fix them … for the better. There are so many changes in life that are inevitable, and we can’t control it, so why exhaust ourselves being the perpetual handyman, tinkering with every element? In a way, my love life, friendships and work have been a form of therapy, showing me just how good things can be when you simply leave them alone. I guess they have all given me some nickel-and-dime psychology. I say to that, thanks. I’ll keep the change.