Home // Blogs // Nikki M. Mascali

Nikki M. Mascali

Wednesday December 02, 2009 | 02:27 PM

Let me start out by saying that I religiously read In Touch magazine — it’s a guilty pleasure, and I will not apologize for it, so kindly move on to the rest of the blog, please and thank you.

I’ve never had a problem making a gift wish list for the holidays. Hell, I revel in it. On this year’s wish list, I would like certain “celebrities” to cease and desist.

(Note: You will not find Tyra Banks or Heidi and Spencer Pratt on this list because I think the entire world would like them to fade into oblivion.)

Jon, Kate and their entire 8

Need I say more?

Photobucket

Lindsay Lohan

While I certainly do not wish ill on anyone ever, Lindsay needs to either overdose or move to a trailer park. You decide, LiLo. And stop wearing leggings.

Photobucket

Katy Perry

Her voice is horrid, but she gets mad props for her ’50s-era style.

Photobucket

Dave Mustaine

Dear Dave, You left Metallica in 1983 and went on to have reasonable success with Megadeth. While I pretty much dislike Metallica (mostly thanks to a hatred of drummer Lars Ulrich), you seriously need to stop talking/bitching/whining about how you were fired from Metallica — in 1983. It’s time to move on. Really, it is. Have a lovely day! Sincerely, your friend in metal, Nikki.

Photobucket

Anvil, and the stupid story of

I think there’s a reason no one cared about this band from 1973-2008: It stinks. It stinks the way garbage stinks on a hot day. Just look at this photo. Further discussion is not needed.

Photobucket

Bret Michaels

Oh, Bret. I’m so disappointed. There you were looking for “love” on a reality show like a common skank while I’ve been here the whole time madly in love with you since I was 10. Now, 22 years later, I’m over you. I will always love Poison and your blue eyes, but I wouldn’t touch you with a 39-and-a-half foot pole. Here’s to what might have been, guess every rose does have a thorn.

Photobucket

Suri, Tom and maybe Katie depending on my mood

I’ve always despised Tom Cruise, but now I’ve added Suri to the list. Katie Holmes I’m still on the fence about because I feel bad for her, with her sad, sunken eyes whenever she’s in her crazy-as-a-loon husband’s presence. But she made her million dollar bed, so I guess she should lie in it. Oh Joey, what have you become?

Photobucket

AnnaLynn McCord

Every once in a while, someone comes along whose face just makes me itch. Past recipients of this title include Ashlee Simpson, Beverley Mitchell and the entire cast of “The View.” AnnaLynn takes the cake, though. She looks like pure evil, like she’s not even human. She should be on “V” or something, instead of “90210.” Just sayin’.

Photobucket

About the Author

Nikki M. Mascali began her career at the Weekender as an intern in 2005 - and holds the honor of being the oldest intern the paper ever had. She received her degree in journalism from Luzerne County Community College in 2007 and joined the Weekender staff full-time in 2006 as staff writer/designer before becoming associate editor in 2010. In March 2011, she was named editor.

Nikki has interviewed everyone from Gene Simmons to Richard Simmons, and her articles have run the gamut from local and national theater to music and in-depth reports on the radio industry and negativity in NEPA.

Nikki enjoys writing, quoting movies, traveling and being a diehard foodie - which is why she pens our weekly food and drink column, "Dish."

Archives

COMMENT HERE

Comment*:


Name*:


E-mail*:

* These fields are required.



2 COMMENTS

Christopher Humphries said...

I don't know much about the rest of the people on this list, yet the Dave Mustaine thing still bugs me. There's no crying in metal.

December 2, 2009 at 3:30 PM

Tiffany said...

LOVE!!!! This blog had me LOL'ing the entire time reading it... which now has me having to attend a seminar on "proper internet use during the work day." Kudos on the blog, and SUPER KUDOS on the grinch reference!

December 3, 2009 at 5:21 PM