Unhooking the hook-up generation

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First Posted: 6/2/2014

Today’s dating scene has evolved into a place where there are minimal amounts of dating actually involved. The hook-up generation has opened new doors of sexual freedoms and emotional unavailability. In order to avoid a messy, painful breakup, society has deemed it easier to have sex without a relationship than having a relationship that eventually leads to sex.

“So, do you want a pic of me?” One might think this is an innocent enough question, until five minutes later you are looking at someone’s frank and beans as opposed to their sparkling face on the screen of your phone. Whatever happened to courtship and dating? Has the element of surprise gone out the window, along with car dates and going steady?

Once word hit the street that I had once again entered a single status, the propositions started rolling in. Guys I haven’t texted or had any interactions with on Facebook or Twitter in over a year were suddenly my best friend and interested in what I was doing Friday night. I was getting messages on my fan page from guys looking for a good time – or graciously sending me pictures of their nether regions. Not one of them asked me if I would like to have dinner or see a movie. I started talking with one guy who I thought was great. We got along so well and had so much in common that I ended up in the friend zone. I keep hitting dead ends, and there are few prospects on the horizon.

Call me old-fashioned, but I like getting to know someone before I plan to invite him into my room. Not to say the occasional fling isn’t both thrilling and exciting, but when looking for a relationship, what cards are left to play when you show your whole hand in the first round?

Sadly, I am finding men are less inclined to give a second look to the girls who are trying to get to know them because there are so many others willing to hop into bed without catching their last name. They don’t want to get attached or emotionally involved with anyone. My ex once said to me that sex had no face. This was also his way of justifying sleeping around because the girls didn’t matter; I had his heart, lucky me.

How do we weed out the hook-up generation believers? Are there still guys on the market willing to treat a girl like more of a lady and less like a tramp? In the words of my magic date ball, “outlook not so good girl” – get yourself some Netflix and ice cream and settle in for a long and lonely summer.