First Posted: 3/4/2014
As springtime slowly inches closer, I want to get a jumpstart on my spring cleaning. I looked around the rooms of my apartment to see what needed the most attention. It was then I noticed the hard truth. After suffering a few days of denial, I am ready to come out about it: My name is Melissa, and I am a hoarder.
The first step in the spring purge is to figure out what I am hoarding and why. After talking to a few of my girlfriends, it seems the things I hoard are not all that uncommon amongst most women.
1. Old makeup: I have a Caboodle in my bedroom circa 1994. It is purple, glittery, and fabulous. It has three shelves and it is bursting at the seams with old makeup. I also have random overflowing cosmetic bags scattered about. My justification is that at one point it cost money and maybe someday I will need that neon green glitter eye shadow or that compact with the crumbs in it.
2. Half-empty shampoo bottles: I like to buy my shampoo and conditioner as a set. The problem is that I will go through a bottle of conditioner in a week and then the shampoo is only a quarter of the way gone. I have started buying two conditioners for every one shampoo but, alas, there are just bottles of old shampoo sitting on the shelf.
3. One sock: I have a pile of mismatched socks. I am convinced that someday the mate will come out of the black hole in the dryer, so I never throw out the one sock. I have the same problem with flip-flops. I have a bin of singles as if I was a stripper for mismatched sandals. I am sure the other is around somewhere. When the day comes that it appears, I’ll be ready.
4. Jeans, plus and minus: I have a drawer of old jeans that are one size up from my present size for just in case (who doesn’t have the occasional fat day?) and one size down because I am certain that someday they will fit again. Jeans are expensive, and it’s only economical to hold onto these, even the old acid wash and super skinny jeans… right?
5. Old underwear: Don’t get grossed out. I don’t mean old as in nasty, but my underwear drawer is literally unable to be closed. Some of them have been worn only once, but every time Victoria’s Secret has the seven for $26 sale, I convince myself I need to go. It’s a sick addiction. They aren’t falling apart and still fit, so I just can’t justify throwing them out.
So is it just me? Is it time to step up the spring cleaning a notch and face my hoarding ways head on? Will it make my life more feng shui to have less clutter or will I finally need that makeup or find that missing sock?
Only time will tell, so stay tuned.
