Let’s get real: Always the shower, never the wedding

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First Posted: 2/10/2015

Dear Melissa,

A girl I work with is getting married and invited me to the shower but not the wedding. I feel insulted as if she is saying we are friends enough that you want me to buy you a gift, but not enough that I want to pay for you to have a meal at the wedding. Should I be insulted or am I just being petty?

-Uninvited party of one

Dear Uninvited,

Unless the wedding is a small private ceremony that is only family, I would be insulted! You are absolutely right that it is rude to invite someone to a shower, where you are expected to get a gift off the registry and not invite that person to share their special day with you. If you feel like it was a pity invite, it probably was. I say skip the shower and use that money to get yourself something fabulous.